It finally got to me and I've snapped. I think,

Write, write all morning.  Try to figure out what I need to bring with me to my book signing tomorrow.  Pick out a dress.  I need to relax.  Went down to B and N just to smell books.  I wonder if they have my book for order.  Look it up on a self-service terminal.  They do!  Then proceed to every self-service terminal in the store looking up my book and leaving it up on the screen.  Escaped without detection.